KEEP MAINE the MAIN THING

Traveling to Maine with my husband. We aren't doing so well on the married side of things.  My prayer is to sow good seed into the relationship, but not lose myself in the process.  He has fits of anger that drive me to over please, over compensate, overeat and go overboard. 

So the main things is:  Not participating in the Dr. Jekyll, Mr. Hyde episodes. This is hard.  I am crying out to God every hour of the day to help me through this rough time. God is faithful. 

NEW BEGINNINGS!

                                                                               


It's Monday!  Time to start off a the week. Honestly, I am dragging.  Too much sugar over the last weekend. BLAH!  What to do about Sugar dipping mood swings. 

I read Psalm 13 today.  The beginning starts off asking God where are you? Are you hiding? The end of this Psalm proclaims: 

But I trust in your unfailing love; 

   my heart rejoices in your salvation. 
 I will sing the LORD’s praise,    
    for he has been good to me. 
Psalm 13:5,6

So regardless of how I feel today, I am going to trust, rejoice, sing praise and remember all the good things God has provided are all around me and throughout my life!  
NEW BEGINNINGS! 

Connections!

Thinking before ending this day, I reflect on the way this day turned out. It was pleasant to spend time with my husband. We remained in the house all day cozy and sound. Together, we watched a movie and a show about people exploring their family histories. We munched down pizza, popcorn, brownies, and ice cream. We had a little party.  


I realize that the goal of nurturing relationships was best served today. I connected with my husband. I connected with my friend who is going through a hard time. I connected with my daughter. Other goals will just have to remain on the list to be realized and tackled in the near future. I


For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:11 

Fresh Air

BREATH!  It is Spring! The daffodils are out and the promise of tulips are on the way. I can't say that I am all together the person I want to be. I want to shake off the winter blues and welcome Spring with open arms. 


Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new. 2 Corinthians 5:17 


My focus has been so inward.  I haven't accomplished the objectives of my goals. This is the year. Well, in fact in less than 2 months i will be 50 years old. A half a century, half way to 100. Over the hill!  I am not embracing the upcoming FRESH Start on the next 50 years, because I haven't been able to conquer my troubles and weaknesses. I spiral into depression so easily. So I have some questions. 


NEW?  Fresh? Spring? I can intellectualize the need for change which leads to drafted plans with objectives in mind. Some days I can chip away at them and other days I hide.  I want to hide from everyone.  Yet, I am a people person. Am I? I really am, when I allow myself to be vulnerable and reach out.  


Fresh AIR!  Breath! Spring!  New opportunities to never give UP.  Embrace the hope that continually rises in my heart. Okay, 


Let's be real.
I need to surrender completely to God, without holding back or hiding.
I need to give myself completely to my relationships, without holding back or hiding. 

I need to lose more than 100 lbs to be healthy and live life to its fullest.
I need to find a full time job or another part time job. 
I need to foster my talent of painting and creativity. 
I need to be more responsible and grow UP!



Grow up strong like the faithful flowers blooming all around me over the next days and months leading to SUMMER!  My favorite Season.  Okay, embrace the Goals, the 50th Birthday, Release the Past, Forgive others and yourself,


BLOOM WHERE YOU ARE PLANTED!  Cliche, but it could launch the whole Spring idea knowing that in Christ, all things do become NEW!  His mercies are new every morning and any time of day and season for that matter. Thank You Jesus for being faithful, even when I fall short in my life. BREATH the Fresh Spring Air! 

Cool Cup

Like a cool drink of water when you're worn out and weary is a letter from a long-lost friend. 

Proverbs 25:25 The Message

I read this Proverb for the first time in my twenties. Now I am in my late forties.  I have lived in the desert of Arizona, the muggy woods of North Carolina, the dry long winters of Michigan and now I reside in the refreshing Pacific Northwest in Puyallup, Washington.  Each of these environments create the different levels of thirst.  Like the desert that is so dry and hot, you need more water, more frequently.  We need water to quench our thirst where ever we live.  We are made of 90 percent water, Right? Right.


Well, the same thing that happens to our body, happens to our relationships.  In our society, our families may be scattered all over the place.  Mine is.  I have family in Florida, Illinois, Arizona, Ohio, California, Nevada, Colorado and Virginia.  We are spread out far and wide.  


In my twenties, married with two small children, I remember my days in North Carolina.  I felt so far from my family.  We didn't have cell phones then, and long distance was expensive, so calls were far and few between.  So when a letter came in the mail, It was like that scripture above, quenching the thirst for that longing for connection.  


One day I was saying out loud, "I miss my family", thinking of my Dad, my Mom, My Sister.  My son, Nikki was five years old and he said, "Mommy, we are your family".  Out of the mouth of babes.   I was longing for the years of my childhood, missing that old family connection that would never happen again, the same way.  


After that day, I grew up a little bit. I learned  build the relationships and create new memories in my daily life with my little family.  It was okay to miss my far away family and enjoy the infrequent connections.  I was thirsty, but sometimes the well that quenches our thirst the most is in our midst, rather than far away.